So You Want to Raise a Boy?

While serving in the FBI, W. Cleon Skousen received special training about juvenile delinquency. This book was written to help parents of today raise their boys to be well-balanced and mature, and help them avoid the pitfalls of youth. Covering birth to age 21, it explains the stages that boys go through as they mature.

Additional chapters also cover drugs, alcohol, sharing the facts of life, stealing, how to build balanced personalities, the ideal family, and the ideal mother and father. This book is the perfect gift for baby showers, birthdays and holidays. (346 pages)

Excerpt from "So You Want to Raise a Boy?":

What is an Ideal Family?

I suppose nearly all young newlyweds approach a marriage career with the firm expectation that theirs will be the greatest. Shortly, however, they find themselves in one of three groups. The first group consists of those who approach marriage like a little boy who says to the organ man, "I've paid my nickel, now let's hear the tune!" To such as these, marriage is sort of a circus. It has to be noisy, colossal, and tremendous. When the noise dies down and the novelty wears thin, so does the marriage.

There is a second group which might be called the "Marriage Muddlers." These are they who never completely crack up, but neither do they become a sensational success. They just muddle through. These are the kind who don't seem to find themselves until about their fiftieth wedding anniversary. As the quiet twilight of life gradually makes them senior citizens and grandparents they suddenly look at each other and say, "Well, look what we did!" They decide that life did not treat them badly after all. In fact they really could have been enjoying it all along!

Finally, there is the third group, the ones who approach marriage with as much excitement as any of the others, but, either by instinct or by training, sense that they are "kingdom builders." Perhaps some day all young couples will be trained to think of themselves as kingdom builders, because that is what Providence intended them to be.

At the head of this tiny empire is a king and queen who have power to rule generously or selfishly, lovingly or harshly, wisely or stupidly. The true kingdom builders are those who learn early in their married life to govern themselves and their somewhat helpless subjects in a warm, happy spirit of generosity, love, and wisdom. From the sidelines, observers will say, "There is an ideal family!"

What is the Formula?

But when newlyweds are encouraged to create an ideal family life they come up with the obvious question, "What is the formula?"

After several thousand years of human civilization, a formula should now be available in a scientific, foolproof package. But, unfortunately, this is not the case. And there is a good reason. It turns out that nobody achieves "ideal" family life status for any extended period of time. Everything will be flying along beautifully for a while, and then unexpectedly there is a tremendous mid-air crash and the family pattern goes into a tailspin. What was once a model of happy living is exploded into confusion as the entire family struggles to meet the new situation and restore order. The crisis may be a financial setback, a serious illness, a burnout, moving to a new town, the loss of a parent, a call to military service, loss of a job, in fact any one of several dozen serious problems.

Building an ideal family is therefore not a goal but a process. It is a pattern of living which centers around a mother and father who are willing to quickly shift with the currents of life. It is a passion to preserve their own little kingdom with its binding bonds of love between father, mother, and children and to do it in spite of all adversity -- poverty, war, crime, accidents, disease, disaster, even death.

Accepting, then, the fact that ideal family life is a process rather than a goal, we cannot help asking, "What is the best process?" What pattern is most likely to produce happy family living? Experts suggest the need to remember three things:
    1. Getting off to a good start.
    2. Providing built-in stabilizers for the family.
    3. Being willing to fulfill the total family role.